


Wish

by Maisunadokei1856



Series: Pandora Hearts Month 2018 [7]
Category: Pandora Hearts
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-11
Updated: 2018-12-11
Packaged: 2019-09-16 07:25:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16949601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maisunadokei1856/pseuds/Maisunadokei1856
Summary: It was however ironic that  in this moment, this instant where he had no friends and no status, he felt for the first time like he possessed something.





	Wish

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Pandora Hearts Month 2018, Week 4 (Various relationships). The prompt was: "Wish".

Everyone who glanced at his true self would define him as clear water  who reflected as many natures as there were people in the world. To  some he was both good and evil, to others he was neither. Jack himself  was infinitely better at figuring others’ natures and feelings than even  trying and looking into his own.

And so, he honestly didn’t know what  was Oz to him. He might have thought of him as an intimate friend who  shared the loneliness of his own body for nearly a century, that he  could as well be family by this point. He might have thought of him as a  tool whose feelings didn’t matter and who served no further goal than  bringing him closer to Lacie’s wish.

He would loom over him  protectively and drive away his enemies with the B-rabbit’s power, and  he couldn’t tell if he wanted to protect him or if he simply wanted to get  back that destruction power he so needed. He would hug him tenderly as  would a loving friend, careful not to break him, while whispering  horrors that could serve no other purpose than actually breaking him. He  would take the gentle and patient tone of an older brother teaching his  sibling when he would tell him of a tragic truth that was too much to  take even for an adult. And whether this contradiction was an act he carried by habit or something deeper, what  he truly felt and what he did for practical reasons… He was too far gone  to be able to tell. He gave up on that a century ago as he was cradling  his most intimate friend’s head in a dark pit. Anyone, even himself, could tell there had been no true purpose to his existence ever since that day.

But admittedly, even if Oz was only a tool, that didn’t mean he was just _any_ tool,  disposable, replaceable. From the time they first met, Oz carried great  emotional value beside his power. A chain of the same type as Lacie’s  who made him feel so much closer to her in more ways than one.

Cute Oz who was given life by Lacie much like himself.

Lovely Oz who sacrificed his body to bring him the last piece of Lacie and give him a new purpose.

Powerful Oz who gave the powerless man he was the strength to take on Glen.

Lonely Oz who shared the emptiness of his heart and his mind more than anyone.

Great Oz who became human when he failed to just stay one, who saw through his emotions to which he himself was too numb, and who taught him of his mistake.

Precious  Oz who finally showed him the golden world Lacie loved so, and never before had he  felt so close to her. Tears streamed down his cheeks when for the  first time he could name this tender feeling he had for Oz.

_Thank you, Oz._

It  had been gratitude for every piece of Lacie Oz brought him, for every  moment of loneliness he made more bearable. In the back of his mind, he  noted that Alice had actually named Oz after Oswald and he ignored  automatically the tinge it caused in his chest.

He thought vaguely that his  way of expressing gratitude and repaying Oz hadn’t been exemplar. But by  now he was way too good at pushing sadness and remorse into the back of  his mind and smiling as if he didn’t have a care in the world. With his  newfound lucidity at having been shown the wrong of his ways, he noted  painfully that this was the only time when it was the right thing to  do. Because it was too late to dwell on his feelings or repair things, and he  didn’t have any time left to do so anyway.

Still he stayed long enough  to see Oz’s last moments. Long enough to see this smiling, crying  face that showed more emotions than he ever remembered how to feel. At that  instant, a tinge of envy brought itself to his attention, and he  wondered how long it was since he felt so much, with so much clarity.

_Your hands have been empty from the start…_

_Everything you have is fake…_

_You can’t have anything, because you destroy everything…_

Painful  echoes of words he had said once himself came back to haunt him. He was  but an empty man with empty hands who couldn’t make things right even  if he wished to. There was nothing in those small hands of his rejuvenated body, not even  a whole soul, only wreckage about to sink forever to the dark bottom of the sea. He couldn’t even keep on the wrong path anymore even if  it were his wish, because the existence known as Jack Vessalius would be  no more soon. But even so, for him who never felt another wish than to  be with Lacie, who never knew of another wish to grant than Lacie’s own, did that  mean he didn’t have a wish of his own?

Ah, that’s right… Even if  that was but a vain wish, he was still allowed to have one, wasn’t he? He’d  be damned if he said it (except he already was), and no one would  believe him anyway, but it was alright to keep that one last secret.  That he truly wished he could’ve protected that boy fading into light  instead of forcing a painful fate on him.

He wished this child’s next life would be a happy one with Gilbert and Alice.

He  wished Lacie and Oswald and Alice (gentle, lovely Alice who found it in  herself to forgive him of all people) could find peace wherever they  were.

And he wished for this world Lacie loved so to never be tainted  again, for it to find peace and become a gentle place where children  would no longer suffer for the mistakes of their parents or for being  born a certain way.

He had nothing, but for that he could still find something to give.

“What about you use this body?“

It  didn’t matter if he gave away the life that was still in this body, or  deny it death to free his soul from the world. His soul had been  rejected by the Abyss a long time ago anyway.

It was however ironic that  in this moment, this instant where he had no friends and no status, he felt for the first time like he possessed something.  Silently, he thought back to when Oz asked him if there hadn’t been another path  for him, to his own realization that if he hadn’t been so mesmerized by  Lacie’s sight, he might have had another fate. And yet, as he  disappeared from this world, he still could not bring himself to wish he  had never met Lacie.


End file.
